When their marriage license turns out to be invalid, Homer asks Marge to marry him in style; but when Homer mysteriously disappears just before the wedding, Bart and Lisa search for answers.

Reverend Lovejoy announces to his congregation that the highest-ranking clergyman of their faith, the Parson, will be visiting the church. Privately Lovejoy is nervous about the visit, as the Parson is his old roommate from Texas Christian. When Lovejoy and the Parson are alone, the Parson says that Lovejoy’s recertification didn’t go through because the credit card used for the filing fee was declined. Lovejoy explains the situation, blaming it on miscommunication with the credit card company. The Parson lets it be known that for the three months Lovejoy wasn’t certified, any religious ceremonies he performed are invalid. This includes the time Lovejoy remarried Homer and Marge after their divorce some eight years earlier. At first Homer dismisses the snafu, telling Lovejoy he doesn’t need a piece of paper to validate his marriage. Marge, however, disagrees.

Marge tells Homer they can go to city hall, and make things legal. When they show up at city hall and are turned off by the unpleasant atmosphere, Homer tells Marge she deserves better. When they return home, Homer transforms the basement into a romantic restaurant. Dressed in a suit, Homer kneels down on one knee, and asks Marge to marry him in style. Marge visits a store to try on wedding gowns, picks out arrangements at a flower shop, organizes staff at a hotel, and coaches bridesmaids — including Patty and Selma — on how to dress for the big day. Patty and Selma are less than thrilled that their sister is getting married to Homer yet again. When the day of the wedding arrives, Marge realizes Homer has vanished.

Homer finds himself chained to a pipe in a dark room. A mysterious voice addresses Homer through a speaker system. Bart and Lisa search for clues, hoping to unravel the mystery of their father’s disappearance. They find a small keychain engraved with the letters “SB.” Back in the dark room, the mysterious voice tells Homer that a key to the lock and chain is inside a lollypop. Homer licks the lollypop only to discover that it’s made of hot sauce. Bart and Lisa conclude that the initials “SB” stand for Sideshow Bob. They find Bob working on a clay bust of Krusty the Clown. Krusty provides Bob with an alibi, eliminating him as a suspect. Bob thinks of another person who fits the initials: Selma Bouvier. As Homer continues to lick the lollypop, Patty and Selma chortle. They know that the key isn’t really a key; it’s just hotter hot sauce.

Patty and Selma vow to keep Homer prisoner until Marge gives him up for good. When Homer reads Patty and Selma his wedding vows, however, they begin to weep. Bart and Lisa rush home to tell Marge about their discovery. To their surprise Homer and Marge are on the couch cuddling. Bart and Lisa confront Patty and Selma. They admit that they set Homer free because he would do anything they asked for a chance to see Marge again. Bart and Lisa agree to keep quiet about what they know, provided Patty and Selma throw Homer and Marge a lavish wedding party. Later, at city hall, Homer and Marge are married. The doors of city hall fly open, revealing an expensive party attended by all of Homer and Marge’s friends.