Miss Hoover instructs her students to write an essay about the town’s founding father, Jebediah Springfield. Lisa is dismayed that little research material about Jebediah exists at the library. She visits the local historical society, where she meets its president, Hollis Hurlbut. Lisa examines Jebediah’s old fife. When she blows air into the instrument, a rolled-up scroll shoots out. The scroll contains Jebediah’s confession that he was, in reality, a murderous pirate. Meanwhile, Homer shows interest in an upcoming parade, and decides to try out for the coveted role of town crier. His audition is impressive—so much so that the Bicentennial Committee members chose him over Ned Flanders.

Lisa tells her family the truth about Jebediah, including details about his tongue, which was bitten off in a grog house fight and replaced by a prosthetic device made of silver. But Miss Hoover gives Lisa an “F” on her essay, dismissing it outright. Lisa is crestfallen. With her father’s help, Lisa returns to the historical society to reclaim Jebediah’s secret confession. But Hurlbut claims the letter is an obvious forgery and tosses it in the trash. Unwilling to accept defeat, Lisa manufactures posters containing the truth about Jebediah. The townspeople, however, refuse to believe the unpatriotic story. Lisa tells committee members that the only way to uncover the truth is to dig up Jebediah’s corpse and search for his prosthetic tongue. But when the skeleton is exhumed, officials are unable to find the prosthetic device.

Lisa has a dream in which George Washington gives her a clue that will prove her belief. Lisa realizes that the real reason the tongue could not be found is because Hurlbut stole it. Confronted with the truth, Hurlbut admits he pried open the coffin and took the tongue. Lisa and Hurlbut make their way to the reviewing stand of the Bicentennial Parade intending to expose the facts about Jebediah. But upon seeing the community of happy, expectant faces, Lisa decides the myth of Jebediah Springfield is far more important than historical fact—and keeps the information from the public.